There are some lawmakers out there who believe the United States will legalize marijuana all across the nation within the next five-to-10 years. The only problem with this prediction is they have been spewing the same unsubstantiated blah-blah-blahs for the past two decades.
It seems that handicapping the death of prohibition in our fair land is not exactly easy to do, especially considering that the country is still mostly governed by stiff-collar conservative forces that subscribe to the opinion that marijuana legalization will bring about the demise of civil society. What’s worse is these shrews are convinced that this supposed disembowelment of the American soul will happen one child at a time… starting with yours!
However, if Congress does no drop the propaganda-laden political shenanigans and make some effort to put this long-overdue reform on the books sometime within the next 100 years, it is conceivable that the human race will literally suffer extinction before the majority of us, including our children, ever get a chance to find out what it means to live in a world where marijuana is handled no differently than alcohol.
At least that seems to be the opinion of renowned physicist Stephen Hawking, who, in a new BBC documentary called Expedition New Earth, explains the world is doomed to its untimely death if humanity fails to colonize another planet within the next several decades.
“With climate change, overdue asteroid strikes, epidemics and population growth, our own planet is increasingly precarious,” Hawking explained.
This prediction is slightly more unnerving than Hawking’s previous theory, which suggested the human race would likely be wiped out sometime within the next 1,000 years—a timeline that did not invoke much concern among that portion of the population that still lies awake at night haunted by the mysteries that come with being born.
However, for those people living with small children, the latest hypothesis indicates that the youth of today could be part of the adult population that either has to find a way to inhabit other planetary jurisdictions or be snuffed out in a manner of which is only known by the dinosaurs. And according to science, they never made a comeback.
“Although the chance of disaster to planet Earth in a given year may be quite low, it adds up over time, and becomes a near certainty in the next 1,000 or 10,000 years,” Hawking said during a lecture last November at Oxford University.
“By that time, we should have spread out into space, and to other stars, so a disaster on Earth would not mean the end of the human race,” he added. “However, we will not establish self-sustaining colonies in space for at least the next hundred years, so we have to be very careful in this period.”
Hawking advises humans to find a way to inhabit the moon or Mars as a way to evade a total catastrophe on Earth. Fortunately, there is already a legion of scientists working to put people on Mars within the next 20 years.
“I’m excited to announce that we are working with our commercial partners to build new habitats that can sustain and transport astronauts on long-duration missions in deep space,” former President Barack Obama wrote in 2016. “These missions will teach us how humans can live far from Earth—something we’ll need for the long journey to Mars.”
But then again, living on the Red Planet would be cold, dark and depressing—sort of like living in a desert, only it never gets even close to warm and there is no weed, Taco Bell or pizza delivery within 50 miles. The second coming of humanity would undoubtedly suck far worse than even the darkest days on planet Earth.
But for the sake of future generations, let’s hope that Stephen Hawking is about as accurate with his latest doomsday prediction as federal lawmakers have been about nationwide marijuana legalization.